Are you relationship ready?

dating ready

The Dating pre-planner

If you’re in the market for love and you want to attract the best quality consumers, then you have to (to take the shopping analogy even further) make sure that you are top product! So let’s check out if  A. You’re really ready and B. You have something quality to offer a significant other …

1.   Drop the baggage

If you want to start something new with somebody, its unlikely to happen or be successful if you got a ton of emotional Samsonite baggage hanging around. Signs that you still need to let go of an old relationship are ¦

  • You still think about your ex a lot “ more than three or four times a week/day/minute.
  •  When you hear about your ex, you feel mad or very sad.
  • You feel scared that you are going to be hurt again
  •  Your ex is still in your life in a way thats not quite healthy. For example, they come around every night for dinner or are still sleeping on your couch!
  • You cant bear to throw out their old toothbrush and other personal momentos they left behind.
  •  The thought of them being with someone else makes you want to turn inside out.
  •  You are occasionally still seeing or having sleep-overs with your ex.

If this sounds like you, then start to cut old ties. Get therapy, talk it out with a friend, write a goodbye letter where you say everything you want, then burn it or have a throw out session of old possessions and memories. If necessary draw a boundary and move on with your life.

2.   Sort out your life

If you totally love your life “ skip to the next question because theres nothing more attractive than someone who is living their passion.  If you wish your day-to-day was different then you are going to have to do some sorting out before you start to date because negativity is a huge turn-off. Signs you need to take control of your life are being ¦

  • Seriously in debt and not taking charge of the situation
  • Unfit or unhappily overweight
  • Unemployed and doing nothing to change it
  • In a job you hate
  • In continuing conflict with a family member or a previous partner
  • Regularly indulging in sabotaging behaviours such as overspending, drinking too many glasses of wine in front of the TV or anything else you know isnt good for you
  • Continually pessimistic

If this sound like you, start immediately to create a life you love. Take control of your finances, plan a dream trip, start saving for your own place, go on that weight loss program, start visiting the gym, find a new job, volunteer with a charity and look for whats great about your circumstances.

3. Decide what you want

If you dont know what you want in relationship, its really likely you will settle for something you dont. Make a list of non-negotiable values that you couldnt compromise on and then add on your wish list. So get clear on if you want to date someone who¦

  • wants kids or who already has them or not
  • has money, status and assets or not
  • has cultural, religious, political or social backgrounds that you share or not
  • is a smoker or not
  • wants to get married or live with you or not
  • shares a particular interest that you are passionate about or not
  •  wants to be based in the same place as you or not

If you find it hard to make a list of what you want, start with what you know you definitely dont. Have fun with it and risk writing down what you most wish for. If you need help ask a good friend who you trust what they think you need in a partner.

If you’ve got this all covered, then you are ready – go date!

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